New thoughts!

So having started this blog because I wanted a place to put down my thoughts, I then fail to write down any of them for almost 7 months. Not that I haven't been thinking at all in that time, it's just, well, life took over.

Looking back on my previous posts, I realise that things have changed. Having dealt with the disappointment of not getting into the Civil Service, God then almost straight away dealt me another hand, this time pocket aces, by allowing me back into the Fast Stream assessment and then helping me to ace the assessment centre: I'm in! Old news, but interesting that I had to go through a period of letting go, truly giving myself and my future over to God before things could proceed. It made me realise that my future is not completely in my hands: whilst I have decisions to make and responsibilities to, well, be responsible for, God is actually the one in control here, not me.

I am truly excited about working for the CS. Not everyone cup of tea, but somewhere where I hope I can make a real difference, and serve many people. As I have thought about what it means to be a Christian working for what is really now a secular government, two words have come out loud and clear: justice and righteousness. Not automatically the ones I would have chosen. Truth would definitely have come into it, as I'm someone who loves to debate about truth, logic, and reality with others. I think though that God is right on these ones though. Truth I think it neatly described by both Justice and Righteousness. Biblically, they're what the Law of God is built on: justice to serve the poor, and the oppressed, to see God worshipped for who He is, as God, and righteousness because obeying the Lord and finding out what His will is the most noble pursuit in life.

Trying to find life by the Law (ie, trying to earn goodness) is foolishness: we can't do it! We'll always mess up. We can bring our attempts and "good works" before God and say, 'look what I did God, aren't I good?' and God will look at them and say (in effect), 'So What? I'm God!' He, and He alone, is good, none other. But as a child of God, chosen and saved by Jesus, made holy by his sacrifice, we can see the Law for what it is: perfection! We won't live up to it fully, and we can't make God love us any more (or any less) by our attempts to live by it. In fact, God promises to live through us, to enable us to live well. It's not just down to us, we're not on our own: God is with us, and is living a Jesus-coloured life through us, to achieve His will on earth. That's what excites me. God has called me into relationship, to live in relation to Him, to realise my place, and to be excited by all He has in store for me. What purpose! I'm not just to wait around here on Earth until the end comes, trying to be good and hoping that heaven will come. I'm called to be someone who impacts the world around me as God works through me, powerfully.

I can find no greater comfort or inspiration than this in my life.

"For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." Ephesians 2:10