Home time

Another term flown by, and I'm left wondering if I made the most of all the opportunities I had whilst in Southampton. Coming back to university has reminded me of all the reasons why I was so ready to leave in the first place (and not just because I wanted to go travelling). The degree was really just a stepping stone, a necessary step to get to where I wanted to get, although to be honest I never really new where that would be. I'm quite tired of not making the most of things, of sort of floating by without really feeling like I've grasped life with both hands and experienced it, or helped anyone else to experience it. I'm at least partly to blame, as I know I haven't really pulled my finger out and got on with things, and lots of opportunities have passed me by, or, are still there, but waiting for me.

Ironically, I came back to university because I had no idea of which direction to take (and a "free" degree sounded like a good thing), but now I've found a little bit of direction and it doesn't really require the degree...hmmm. I love that delicious irony, it teaches me that I'm not fully in control, but that I don't have to be. That in some senses I can "enjoy the ride", because God's got my back, but from another perspective what it really means is that, since my future and safety is secure, I can push myself out of my self-defined comfort zone and actually make a difference, do something of importance, relevance and impact, serve with everything I have because that is the only way was meant to be lived.